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~ By Courtesy of Others ~

The Saga of the Lightbulb                    The Saga of the Lightbulb MP3
Tune: "When Johnny Comes Marching Home"   Midi   PDF   Listen on YouTube

Ten Heathens were at a gathering,
Washael, Washael
The mead horn they were passing,
To honour their Gods and their kin,
All was well when suddenly,
The light bulb blew and they could not seeeee,
So the host went running to fetch a new bulb from the hall.
He stood up on his great high seat,
To fix the bulb, 
When one of the gathering gave a shout,
What if the Gods acted deliberately,
Maybe they don't like el-ec-tric-ity,
Does anyone know if there's aught written down in the Lore.

The gathering they didn't have a clue,
So called ten more,
They had some thoughts but couldn't be sure,
Oh no what now, 
We could start a new group and have a wee chat,
But we'll need a con-sti-tut-ion for that,
So the host sat down and buried his head in his hands.

Perhaps a survey is what we need,
Lets go online, 
We'll ask the Heathens across the land,
Then the host yelled out,
I'm sat on the high seat tentatively,
Sing me the song and I'll ask the wise threeeee,
But nobody was listening, as they posted their survey online.

The survey results came back in force,
From seventy five, 
But two of those have long since died,
So we can't count those (*spoken* can we not, NO!!!!)
Let's turn the bulb clockwise and see how it goes,
But then that's a circle and we don't do thoooossseee,
Then the host lost his temper and changed the old bulb anyway.

Now two kindred Gods were watching this,
With quite some glee,
Thor said to Loki, 'You have to admit',
'I win the bet!',
ten and ten and seventy three,
That's nighty three heathens to change the light bulb,
'Hmmm', thought Loki,
but only one did the work, double or quits on the fire alarm.

Kim Thornton


The tune was first used for both "Johnny I Hardly Knew Ye", Irish anti-war song, early 19th century,
and "When Johnny Comes Marching Home", song of the American Civil War, published in 1863

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